Husband and Wife signing divorce document

Life After Divorce

The Law Offices of Steven E. Springer May 23, 2024

When you finalize your divorce, you may have mixed feelings about it. On the one hand, you might enjoy freedom, closure, and relief. But, on the other hand, you might also be hit by a wave of sadness, fear, and anger. We here at The Law Offices of Steven E. Springer have seen our clients in this state of ambivalence after divorce many times, even those clients who initiated the divorce proceedings.  

The moment you get a divorce, it might seem like you’re starting from square one. And since they don’t teach us the “how to rebuild your life after divorce” lesson in school, many people may need to rely on professional help during this transitionary period.  

At The Law Offices of Steven E. Springer, we understand how emotionally draining a divorce can be. That’s why our divorce attorneys in Santa Clara County, California, always strive to provide our clients with the compassionate support they need before, during, and after divorce. Our clients aren’t just numbers to us. We care about our clients, and we genuinely want them to move forward with confidence and transition into a happy post-divorce life.  

Allow Yourself to Be Sad

Each year, more than 670,000 couples get a divorce across the United States, according to data by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Many of those who get divorced bounce back and move on. And so should you.  

After a divorce is over, it is perfectly normal to feel seemingly contradictory emotions: from relief to excitement to anger to sadness. Often, couples who have an amicable divorce are less likely to have negative emotions post-divorce. That’s why our attorneys at The Law Offices of Steven E. Springer always strive to help our clients understand how important it is to have a healthy divorce and do everything possible on our end to make their divorce as amicable and stress-free as possible.  

However, even if you feel sad after your divorce is over, you shouldn’t be ashamed of how you feel. And you shouldn’t try to suppress your emotions either because this will make it more difficult to find closure. Instead, allow yourself to feel that sadness. Don’t rush through this process. This stage might last from a few days to a few months, depending on the individual. Consider seeking support from your family, friends, or a therapist if you need help with processing your feelings.  

Do What Your Divorce Decree Requires
You to Do

As you work on your emotional and psychological well-being after divorce, you shouldn’t forget to follow the terms and conditions specified in the divorce decree.  

Often, a divorce decree will order one or both partners to take specific actions following the dissolution of the marriage. These actions may include:  

  • Closing joint bank accounts. 

  • Refinancing the marital home. 

  • Removing their personal belongings from the marital home. 

  • Assuming marital debts. 

  • Paying child support and/or alimony. 

If you are not sure what specifically you need to do to comply with the divorce decree, consider speaking with an attorney. Our divorce attorney will carefully read through your decree and explain what steps you should take to ensure that you don’t miss anything.  

Create a Financial Plan

It’s no secret that divorce has an immeasurable impact on your financial situation. People who can lessen that impact by reevaluating their income and expenses. Take a step back and look at your broad financial picture.  

This will allow you to create a financial plan to stay afloat and reach your long-term goals: 

  • Gather your financial documents, including tax returns, bank statements, and other relevant information to analyze your current financial situation.  

  • Create a realistic post-divorce budget that takes into account your income and (reasonable) expenses.  

  • Protect your credit and assets by opening your own bank account (if you don’t have one yet) and updating your documents such as insurance policies, wills, trusts, and retirement accounts to remove your ex-spouse’s name where necessary.  

  • Think about your investment and savings strategies that would be aligned with your long-term financial goals.  

There is nothing worse than losing control over your financial situation after divorce. Add financial struggles to your emotional hardships, and this becomes a recipe for disaster. That’s why you need a proactive and organized approach when it comes to financial planning.  

Co-Parent Based on Court Requirements

If you and your ex-spouse share children, getting used to co-parenting will be an integral part of your life after divorce.

First and foremost, you will have to think about the logistics for school, children, living, visitation pick-ups and drop-offs, and other matters. You and the other parent also have to follow the parenting plan–also referred to as a custody agreement–carefully.  

If you don’t understand a specific term in the agreement, you might want to seek an attorney’s advice. Every couple’s parenting plan is unique and tailored to their specific circumstances and the needs of their children. 

By understanding exactly what you need to do, you can cultivate a healthy and productive relationship for years to come. While you do your best to stick to the court requirements when co-parenting, you should also keep an eye on the other parent’s compliance with the court orders and consult with an attorney if you think your ex fails to adhere to the terms of the custody order or you suspect your ex is putting your child at risk.  

Plan Your Personal Life After Divorce

Last but not least, you cannot detach yourself from divorce emotionally if you don’t prioritize your personal life. This means mastering the skills of self-discovery and self-love. This also involves understanding your priorities in life. Do you want to travel? Do you want to advance your career? Do you want to take classes? Do you want to focus on your hobby? Setting your priorities straight will help you redefine your future and connect with your inner self.  

As for new relationships after divorce, it’s up to you to decide how soon you are emotionally ready to see new people. However, if you were awarded or ordered to pay child support, you need to understand how a new child or marriage may affect support.  

Transition to Your New Life With The Law Offices of Steven E. Springer

If you are considering filing for divorce, our attorneys at The Law Offices of Steven E. Springer are here to help you escape an unhappy marriage and pursue a more satisfying and fulfilling life. You are just one call away from embracing a fresh start in your life. Discuss your situation with our attorneys during a free consultation.